Music Notes (Heartbeat #3) Read online

  She must notice that I’m starting to panic. “Rand, look at me. It will be fine. You’ll see. We will work all the tour dates out. I will come along on some and your fans will love you.” Still smiling, but not forced, Madison laid her coffee to rest on the side table. She tucks her legs up under her retreating in a safe position. I have seen her do this protective, cool, calm barrier before when she didn’t know I was watching. She curls up and smiles at me, trying to convey that everything is fine, but she is frightened of the unknown. I have watched her evolve so much and gain a voice and show actions that make her so much more than that insecure woman I first fell in love with. Since she is a writer, she could stay in a room for days in a bubble stroking keys for endless hours. That is the farthest thing from what is about to happen with me throwing myself into a solo tour—fully exposed to all.

  “The good news about all this is that I’m keeping the band. There was talk of me having another band to go with me but the guys and I talked it out and Rolling Isaac’s will be my band for this solo gig. When they aren’t with me they can keep performing where they want as the Rolling Isaac’s. They have already been looking for a vocalist to join them.” I knew this would make her feel a bit relieved. She loved my band mates, and it seemed so did her girlfriends. We were a tight bonded group. I had her full attention now, and she seemed to calm down, some of her nervousness fading away. I wanted to continue to make her feel this way.

  “Love, if this tour with the guys gets too much or I am away from you too long I will give it all up. You hear me? I would—no, I will—walk away to be with just you. Do you feel me?” I can see Madison physically relax from my words. She has brightened up at my willingness to walk away from the tour if it is too much for her. It was as if saying it out loud, that she was the most important thing to me, was all it took to bring her back to the moment with me and away from her worries about the tour. I moved over to her and I knew she began to get it because when I bent down and lifted her halter top over her head without having to untie it, she was right there with me. Madison gave me access by bringing her arms straight up. I then moved to kiss her belly first where the most important present was cushioned inside. “Breathe my love, it will all be okay, I will never jeopardize you or my kids.” My lips and tongue stirred her, and I kept kissing my way up her body. I took my time on each of her nipples, knowing the effect it had on her—I was happy to spend as much time as she could stand. I was ready for more, but not here. Not out on the balcony where everyone at the resort could see. I pulled her top back into place and turned away.

  “Oh, I feel you Rand. I want you so don’t start what you aren’t going to finish.” Finish? I was just getting started with her for the day, and hell the sun could set on this beautiful strip of beach and I would still not be finished with my love. Not in a lifetime. Madison has not one clue that when I look at her that I’m dreaming with my eyes open.

  Chapter Four – Simply Mad Release

  We hadn’t even hit the front door of our home and I could see too many cars lined up in the driveway. There were so many, they were also parked in the spaces over at the barn. I had no idea what was going on. Maxwell had told me he and the guys were getting things together for the tour. There were too many cars though. Madison is seated in the limo on alert, already wondering what this flurry of activity is about. As the driver takes our luggage out, I look toward the house and catch the slight glimpse through the window of the pink and blue balloons. Oh shit. This is about to shock the hell out of her. Madison is exhausted from the entire day of airport travel. Her thoughts were set on a B&B—a bed and bath.

  I reach out and take her hand, “I love you so much.” Her eyes question not my love, but my sudden tenderness. We were together the past weeks on our honeymoon, and she is clearly suspicious as to why I’m saying this. Just then the front door flies open, and the party begins. Grace is the first through the door, coming at Madison with excitement written all over her face.

  “Honey, why didn’t you tell us sooner? This is such great news. We are all so very excited!” Grace shouts.

  “Mom, sorry but we planned to tell you now when we got back and here we are.” Madison doesn’t want her mother upset, but surely by the smile on her mother’s face that is the last thing that is happening. Suddenly everyone is outside greeting us and hugs are going around our entire home.

  “Hey man this is great news. Twins!” Raeford slaps me, but I see a slight sadness in his eyes. Jillian is next to him and she pulls me in for a hug. I watch her go to Madison and smile, and give her a hug but after they separate and the next well wisher steps to Madison, I notice Jillian stare out across the yard sadly.

  Heading into the house I realize that there were two parties going on. First, half of the room was decorated in pink and blue. The other half was a Simply Mad release. There is the cover fully blown up on foam board. It’s the photograph of Madison that appeared weekly on her newspaper column. Her looks haven’t really changed a bit over the years. The only difference is that now—after marriage and with kids on the way—she is really glowing, fucking glowing. I had heard that women do this but just seeing her here today, she is radiant. I will have to remember that and write about her later. I grab the napkin off the bar and I write across it, you are so fucking hot, you are radiant, I can’t keep my eyes off you…I am mesmerized by your radiance. I stuffed the napkin in my jacket pocket to pull out another time and write more lyrics to it. I guess this is really happening—twins coming and going on a tour. Taking inventory of all the people in the house now, I decided to never give out good news and house keys while you are out of town. You will return to a party whether you want it or not.

  Maxwell came up to me, “Sorry son, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. We planned to surprise you with the cover reveal of Simply Mad, and have folks over but then the news of the babies—well that needed a celebration too.” I couldn’t be upset. This is what good people do that really care about us. Here is my uncle calling me “son”. Really, he is the only father figure I have ever had. I will do right by him and be a great father unlike my own that is totally MIA.

  “No I can’t be mad. Surprised yes, but definitely not upset.” I replied. I see my wife across the room already holding up two miniature guitar toys. Then she lifts two baby outfits that say Rock Me to Sleep and it had a teddy bear on it with music notes. Crazy—all this shit here in the house is pure crazy. I’m happy to see Madison taking it all in stride, knowing she is exhausted.

  Our home is filled with everyone. I make my rounds and so does Madison, each of us in opposite directions. I wander over to the album celebration area laughing at something that Kent just said. Cecile is positioned at his side. I had some doubt about whether she would stay with him or move on with Connor, but right now I think that it is apparent what she decided. Cecile remarked, “Rand I am so happy for you both. One day, I want to have a little one for myself and feel the joy you both must be experiencing.”

  Kent’s interest peaked at her comment, “Oh, I can certainly help you out in that area.”

  “Whoa, hey buddy, don’t get too far ahead of yourself! I know you can certainly help me but I like how we’ve been taking things slow, at least for now.” Cecile smiles back to Kent. Kent returns her a charming smile but then he turns to me and huffs out a breath, apparently still sexually frustrated.

  This is really unbelievable that here we all are and it seems we are all on the same high from happiness. Knowing I will be heading out in the days ahead, I look around for Madison. I didn’t want to be away from her since the clock was ticking on our time together. I find her seated with everyone around her hanging on her words. I begin to walk up to her from behind, and I don’t know what came over me, I had to sing out some words to her. I tried to sing them for her ears only.

  “Madison, you know I Love you and I’ll never leave your side, day or night…I am always here for you.”

  I paused suddenly with everyone staring at me.

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nbsp; Someone yelled “Rand keep going. That was sweet.” I started to hum again and picked up with some more words,

  “I Love you, here with you by my side, we both know it’s true.”

  I had to stop. Madison was looking at me, telling me with her eyes that she wanted me to just pick her up and carry her away with me. I sit close to her, hearing her sigh. I rest my head on her shoulder, “Love, please don’t sigh. I will keep you happy long after all our friends and families are gone.” I can’t resist. I can feel her next to me, and I have to kiss her delicate neck. Madison didn’t bat me away as she usually would have with company here.

  But she stands, grabbing my hand and asks “Rand can you come help me with something?” What that something is she never needed to explain. We walked down the hall and ducked into our home office. The French doors were pulled tightly but they were made of glass and you could see right into the room. Over in the corner I saw that our luggage was piled from our trip. We never did make it in to unpack everything and crash as we talked about on the ride from the airport. Madison was already going through the pile and on a quest for something. All I could do was stare at her ass high in the air as she bent over every suitcase. Thinking back for a moment, I never did see her face that night. I came into my hotel room after drinking with the band. Too many complimentary drinks from the local bar, I think its name was Diving Dukes, no it was Driving Shoots—oh hell, I don’t remember. All I know is when I hit the bed in the cheap ass hotel that at least I had a bed I didn’t have to share with one of my band mates. I fell back onto the bed and laid there watching the rotations of the ceiling fan and then the bed moved. Not motion sickness, I felt it depress near my feet. I remember taking the hand of a beautiful girl from the bar into mine and climbing into the cab with her. I raised my head to see the back of a naked girl, with her long blonde hair reaching the middle of her back tipping across the tattoo that she had across her lower back. Her tattoo was a row of music notes. It drew me in and I rose further up from the bed. She then rose and stood tall and bent over, never turned back to face me, but she exposed her lovely ass and simply stated, “Oh Max, thank you for bringing me back with you.” I wasn’t even feeling my fingers as I pressed them deep in to the awfully soft mattress to rise up, but I knew my lower half was feeling her. As I got close to the edge of the bed, I somehow managed to roll on a condom and suddenly I was in her, hips pumping. I then escaped during our sex to playing a musical composition in my head. When I finally came, because I had a ton to drink, I pulled out and fell back to where I originally was across the mattress. I remember thinking that I don’t want to treat any woman like this. I feel callous and, I just wish I could feel something real again in my heart. She walked forward to the bathroom and never turned back. I don’t remember her coming out of the bathroom or leaving the hotel room. When I woke the next day I knew I had sex as there was a used condom as a reminder lying on the floor. I will never know who she was and then it didn’t really matter to me. I wonder how I could have been so cold to the girls I was with. I feel bad knowing that I have children coming, and I only pray they never do as I did back then. Madison has taught me to be so responsible. “Take me, take me now.” I hear the words and I still am seeing the girl bent over in front of me again, but this time this one turns toward me and I see a sexy familiar smile on her face. It is my Madison, bent over near the corner where the luggage is piled high. She is so precious to me and I feel so much for her. My heart just keeps growing every moment I am with her. “Rand, do you want me like this?” she dares question as she leans forward further and her ass is high in the air.

  Looking at her I am still stunned, “You are the sexiest, most amazing woman in this entire world and I need to taste those lips first before I take all of you.”

  We wound up having a quickie but I was satisfied for the moment. Madison eventually found what she came here for, our camera. “Here it is…let’s go share the pictures with everyone.” She tugged my hand, and I went following her, I would follow her anywhere.

  It hadn’t crossed our minds to preview the photos before showing anyone. Madison had taken so many photographs of our honeymoon and there were many moments she would be surprised by as well. Several days I awoke and took some of her sleeping, and she looked like she was smiling in her dreams. I took more of her glancing off to the sea from the balcony at the resort. When she wasn’t posing, I was taking candid pictures. A few I wanted for my eyes alone. As we clicked through the photos, many commented on the blue of the waters, and then one photo that I had taken of her breasts waiting for my lips to take over and the next of her lying in her sexy black short silk nightgown. “Rand, I didn’t know you took all these!” she shouted quickly fast forwarding past those photos. I knew though that I would be viewing those actual sights again soon. Every picture of her was completely embedded in my head.

  The photo session came to a quick halt and then we heard someone say it was cake time to change the topic. “Hey everyone let’s come to the kitchen to celebrate,” Grace said as she started to tap people to move in that direction of our home. In the kitchen were three large cakes. The first, was decorated with my cover of Simply Mad, again displaying the loveliness of my wife. Then there were two cakes, one pink and one blue for whatever sex our twins would be. There were no candles to be blown out for these, but it was hard to keep my band from ripping into the cake. I remember my birthday cake in Vermont. They attacked that like they attack their music and I never got any. This time I put a slice on a plate and took Madison into the back room.

  I placed a bit of icing on her nose and then I started to sweep my lips over it. I was delighted with the sweetness of the frosting. I kept my eyes focused on how adorable she truly is. There is such an allure about her, a charm she doesn’t even see. Madison giggles softly at our playful moment, I love her so much, and I knew I was going to miss these moments while out on tour. These are the moments that define you whereas the performance on the road exposes you. The public doesn’t get to view who you really are when you are at home or especially with your loved ones. I wrap my arms around her waist and shake my head. Too many times I asked her how I got so lucky. This time, she gave me the accolade first, “Babe, you are the best husband and will be the greatest father. Can you believe this? We are going to be parents!” I could do nothing more than take those sweet, pink lips to mine to savor where those words had just come from.

  “Hey you lovebirds.” I looked up to see Maxwell. “Hate to break this up, but I need to steal Rand a moment to take this call to talk to Meila.”

  As I turned back to Madison, I saw it. There was a change in her eyes. I know she is wondering who Meila is, and already had that slight doubt creep back in. I think sometimes I need to tell Maxwell to filter just a bit. I don’t think he understands how insecure Madison can be. I know she needs to know about Meila, but I wish Maxwell would have just said it was an important call I needed to take. My wife has become so strong and confident, and I want her to stay that way. I am so proud of her and how she has dealt with me and the band and all the exposure, but now it will be on an even larger scale with the fan girls and the media. Madison is a private person and I hope she will dive into her writing to pass the time while I am away.

  “Okay, okay. Let me go take this call…Meila is just the singer of the opening band for our tour. Love, I will be right back.” I gave her another quick kiss before letting her go. “And Maxwell, note for the future, moments like these, turn away and come get me at another time,” I said jokingly to hide my irritation from Madison, but I glared in Maxwell’s direction. Walking back to the office I took the phone to talk to Meila.

  “Hello the ever famous, gorgeous, sexy Rand. I cannot wait to feel you, I mean feel your music. I am excited and looking forward to being with you real soon.” Meila seemed to purr through the phone. She continued, “So I hear you’re happily married. I hope you still act like the rock star I have heard so much about, and won’t let being attached inhibit you
on the road.” I had to clear my throat and adjust my pants. It feels wrong to still have the lingering effects of my time with Madison while I’m talking to another woman. I heard Meila and her words, but she can’t be for real. She is opening for me, and she better watch her step and not cross any lines. I won’t let her screw with me and try to break me because that is never going to happen…I love Madison that much.

  “Hey Meila, guess I get to meet you over the phone. I have to get up to speed on your music, and I will but I just returned from my honeymoon.” I remained businesslike in my delivery with her.

  “Even though you are apparently off the market in the girl department, Rand don’t worry we will still pimp you out as the sexy singer you are. I am looking forward to the concert dates with you. Mark my word, we are going to play, party, and have the time of our lives.” Our conversation carried on briefly about her tunes, and led into her telling me which of my songs were her favorites. It was an awkward meet and greet. I kept feeling that she was a cat on the prowl, but she would have to keep that at bay or I would have her replaced. Again my thoughts wandered to Killjoy. Why couldn’t she be opening for me?

  Keeping my thoughts on business, I continued my conversation with her, “Meila, looking forward to it.” No need to add anything further. When I was about to hang up the phone a delicate hand slipped around my waist, and my eyes immediately locked on to the wedding ring on it. I let out a loud sounding “Mmmm.”