Rock Notes Page 3
Chapter Three – Bejeweled
South Beach was a very short drive down the coast of Florida, again we were split into two vans for the ride, with the guys in one and Rand and I in the other. I wasn’t sure if Maxwell was okay with this arrangement, but he seemed to enjoy his time with the boys. He never complained, he was like a coach preparing the team for their next game. He always appeared proud and didn’t rattle easily. So far in my writing I was seeing some really crazy stunts by all band members, yet Maxwell never seemed to notice.
We pulled up to a nice boutique hotel as most in South Beach are which make them smaller, quaint, not your average chain hotel. This décor was vintage and from the entrance into the lobby, I felt like I had gone back in time. After we all checked in I wandered out to the property which was directly on the beach. I walked gracefully at the edge of the very long, thin rectangle shaped pool, and headed toward the huge, wooden gates that opened to the South Beach sand. Beyond there I viewed the beauty of the swaying palm trees waving to the blue ocean waters. Flanking the pool were the private, comfortable cabanas. Since it wasn’t summer, a few were still empty. I walked back and climbed up into one, and felt like the Princess and the Pea. Totally surrounded by white fabric sitting within the comfortable pillow cushions, I took out my writings and put my reading glasses on and began to transcribe my latest thoughts.
There was a nice breeze carrying through the cabana and the fabric doors were tied back leaving the entrance open. I looked up several times and glanced at the few people in the pool area and at one point the server from the pool bar popped his head in to see if I wanted a beverage, so I ordered a frozen Mojito. When my drink arrived, I did not watch him set it down as I was in deep thought on my laptop. Then I noticed the lighting had decreased in the cabana, and I looked and saw Rand before me with the cabana’s drapes drawn.
“Mind if I join your private cabana?” he asked.
“Not at all, it is so wonderful, I’m just taking it all in,” I replied but then he stopped my voice. He sat down next to me and turned my chin toward him, he held my chin in his hand and leaned in and took over my mouth. Kissing me softly and slowly he licked my lips in between, his hands played with my hair and then he rubbed my neck and shoulders. As quickly as this began and I started to feel excitement inside, he ended the kiss. He climbed up next to me, took out his journal and put his glasses on and began to write. This was nice, but I can’t explain it, he would tear me up with a passionate kiss and then be so close but, as a friend, next to me like we were growing old together.
I didn’t want to give any of it up; I started to realize I felt a need for his touch, his kiss, his just being near me. As we both were off in our thoughts and writing he reached over and stroked my leg a bit, always in a drawing, artistic manner and tapping so I assumed he was writing music.
What a wonderful afternoon this had been with him, tonight would not be as serene. The band asked me to hang with them as they went out in South Beach. It began with me meeting them in the lobby. I chose to wear a black beaded halter top and lower rise jeans, and strappy sandals with a very high heel. I was thinking that if we were hitting clubs that would keep me cool, when the elevator opened to the lobby they were all clapping at how I looked, seeming like my biggest fans. During this moment it was like I had a family, a band family and I felt very warm and appreciated.
Rand was not there yet and they said he would be down shortly. Moments later Kent came up to me when we were exiting the lobby and remarked on my sexy bare back. He said that he just had to kiss it. As he leaned up to me to plant his kiss, his lips were swiftly blocked my Rand’s strong hand. That was so funny; Kent actually had closed his eyes and kissed Rand’s hand. All of us were hysterically laughing. We all dined earlier so we decided get some after dinner drinks.
We were staying in the heart of South Beach and bars are at every street corner. We walked up Lincoln Drive and sat for awhile ordering some shots and beers. I looked over to see Isaac having fun with the ladies there and then I saw Kent chatting it up as well. Ron, he was actually out walking about the Lincoln Drive area, which is several blocks closed off from traffic. The area contains plenty of shopping, coffee houses, restaurants and bars. I think he was crushing on a girl back in Philly and he wanted to talk to her some more. I caught him several times this week speaking to her while we traveled. Young love, so cute I thought.
Raeford, he surprised me this evening. He stayed by my side more than most nights and made certain other men didn’t come up to me. It was like he was a back up for the nearness of Rand.
We all drank a lot; the shots went down too smoothly. The guys were all singing, hell I think I was singing too. Not that I was a bad singer, I sing in the shower often. A few times I saw Rand speaking with some stunning women at the side of the bar and he would glance back to me, and if Rand was away, Raeford was close to me. I decided to head back toward the bathroom, it was necessary after all these drinks. As I walked past I heard the one stunning girl at the bar that Rand was up near earlier rave about him taking her telephone number. I felt a pang of sadness hearing that but he wasn’t mine, I guess I was his friend. I know I hadn’t seen him lately kiss too many women or take any of them back to his room, but I also was not naïve that I only spent a few hours a day with him leaving him plenty of playtimes.
When I got back to the bar, lined up was another round of shots. I think, I know, I was way past the legal limit, we all were. I was leaning my head on Kent’s shoulder and he actually did not try anything funny with me. Isaac yelled, “Let’s put these down and get the hell out of here…it’s a surprise you’ll like, Madison!”
Rand lifted my head lightly from Kent’s shoulder and took my hand, wrapping his fingers over it. We all headed a few blocks down and then I saw where we were heading, I froze even in my altered state. It was a lit store front Bejeweled Body Piercing & Tattoo. The band was excited; they were all shouting what they were going to get done. Then they turned to me and asked what I was getting done.
“No, no, I have no tattoos, no piercings, not happening to my body,” I proclaimed. Next thing I know I was lying on a comfortable table in a private, back room with curtains drawn and Rand handed to Russ, the owner and skilled tattoo artist, several hundred dollars to cover the evening’s piercing party for the band. The guys were all out front flirting with the female employees and selecting their piercings.
Rand stood next to me and said, “So which belly ring is it going to be?” Somehow, I had agreed to get a navel piercing. Did I really agree to this, was I crazy?
“Rand, why don’t you pick it out for me,” I answered. “I like how you taste, I mean I like your taste, I mean you taste good.” I wasn’t speaking too clearly, still feeling my head swaying with all the alcohol we consumed. Rand laughed and walked over to the counter that had hundreds of choices and I heard him select one and he handed it to the tattoo artist. As I felt the artist, Russ, coming toward me I panicked. I was so nervous and getting scared.
Rand came and took my hand and calmed me. He looked at me with those deep blue, sea calming, sexy eyes and said, “Madison trust me, it won’t hurt, I think you’ll really like it.”
“I really don’t take pain well, I like pleasure not pain, I’m sure I’ll scream.”
“Oh I’ll take you screaming with pleasure but not here. It’s going to look great. Russ here’s a pro he’s done all my tattoos.”
Russ then asked me to undo my jeans and pull them low, and he went to move my halter top up off my stomach. Rand took over and did that, just resting my beaded top under my chest. Russ moved in and marked my belly button. Then I saw him thread something onto what looked like a fish hook.
I yelled and squeezed Rand’s hand, “Oh, God, there is no way, I can’t do…” Rand plunged into my mouth so deeply he swirled his tongue and traced my teeth, he remained deep in my mouth, tasting me, kissing me and not at all releasing me.
“All done, you did great!” Russ spoke and our
lips parted, Russ gave a firm pat to Rand on the shoulder and exited the room. I was certain I had just stepped onto the fifth rung of my confidence ladder.
I suddenly felt a current go through my body. No pain just a rush, can’t explain it. The kiss was a rush but different from this other feeling. Proud of myself for doing this, I looked down at my belly to see a tiny music note dangling. Rand bent down and kissed the area around it, saying aloud, “Madison you’re now my secret musical note.”
It looked great; I was staring back and forth between the piercing and Rand. He kept me lying there and continued to kiss around my navel and then brought his hand to where my beaded halter was piled and he started to push his hand so lightly underneath. Feeling my nipples, swirling each one, giving equal attention to them as he let out a deep sigh. Rand traced the outer sides of my waist with his finger tips, stopping for a moment to reach back to my face and take my mouth with his once more.
I murmured, “Oh Rand…” then he kissed my nose and I was actually trying to slow my breathing.
I pulled his tee up over his head as he was now half naked above me. It felt so amazing to look up at him and get lost in his eyes. I lowered my glance and stared at his chest, his incredible chest, and his remarkable ink that was there in front of my eyes. It was a large, very detailed cross with a lot of scrolled designs swirling and surrounding it. Entwined in the cross was an open heart outline. The ink artwork traveled down along the right side of his rib cage and waist. On his right arm from his bicep to just below his forearm is the tattoo I only got a glimpse of when I first met him. It was written dream of music, my beloved. This was surrounded by detailed design work that made each of the words beautiful and endearing.
I rose upward from the table and traced the heart on his chest with the tip of my tongue and placing sweet, light kisses as I moved along the cross above me. I licked the edges of my tongue over his artwork and tasted the flavor of the skin on his chest. Oh, God, help me, I thought as this felt so good. Rand, then went back down to my belly and lightly hit the jeweled music note to make some movement, it did not hurt. I hoped my hands didn’t hurt him as I began to rake at his back and his bare skin moved beneath my finger tips, and continued down and traced the tops of my fingers down his back to his hips. His hands went lower to the opening of my jeans that had been pushed out of the way and were resting just below my hip bones. He slowly and ever so lightly took his fingers to the top of my panty lace and lifted just under the seam and traced along my naked folds with his fingers inching lower.
My belly and my hips tingled with sensations and started to rise up, I felt shivers in me, and I was unaware that I could feel like this again. It was amazing. It occurred to me that if he kept this up I would shatter into a million pieces.
Lying there, I was moving my lower body to his tender tracing movements. I could feel my nipples peaking and my pulse quickening and God, I wanted him to go further. I did not want him to stop. Rand spoke in a light, sexy voice, “I can’t do this, I mean I want to, I really want to, but I can’t give you what you need…” But he kept kissing my stomach in between his every whispered word. I lifted my hips up off the table to meet his kisses and they became more firm. He lowered his head to my thighs and dropped it slowly into the deep fold of my jeans. He slid one arm under my rear and lifted me, pressing me more fully into his face. I fisted his hair and tightly pulled some dark strands through my fingers. The only sound I could make was, “Please, just please don’t stop…”
Isaac pulled back the makeshift curtain and looked at us in our intimate position. In a low growl he said, “Now that’s the kinda piercing I want.” The intimacy of the moment was abruptly lost. The band guys were through having their piercings done and were ready to leave.
Rand told them to go ahead; he knew they wanted to go to the clubs until later in the morning. He wanted to hang back and return to the hotel and snuggle in the fabric covered cabana and watch the evening stars and dream – with me.
“Jillian, Jillian, pick up your phone, do not text me, I need to talk to you…” I nervously left her this same message already six times this morning. I had to talk to her, I could not sleep. It was very early in the morning, and I couldn’t breathe in and out like I used to. What was happening to me? Was this an illusion or was all this really happening? I could feel something again and I didn’t want to have it begin just to lose it, I was so torn. Oh, Jillian please call me, I need you sis…
Mid morning I got her call back. “Maddy what’s up? You okay, your messages sounded urgent?”
“Oh Jillian, you will not believe what’s happening.” I rattled on and on. “I so think I could fall for him, I hope it’s not a game. I feel for him, and I wish I knew he felt the same.” We talked for at least two hours and she had calmed me and told me to go for it and see where it leads. She said she hoped that he would develop real feelings for me. She was glad I was out having fun and doing what I wanted with writing, but we both knew and did not say it, we knew Rand had a history with the ladies.
We talked about the calendar of concerts that I sent her. She would arrange to head to her brother Jason’s and we could all meet up for a few days and she would attend a show with me in Atlanta. As we were winding up our lengthy and necessary girl talk, she paused and said, “Listen, I have something else to tell you. Thomas called your home and called me. He recently heard through the rumor mill that you’re traveling around with a band. I couldn’t help myself and told him they are all gorgeous hot guys and they love you.” She continued with, “You owe him no explanation for what you do, but I told him that it was about your writing and you were doing great. He wants you and him to catch up and thinks maybe he can invite himself to take in one of their concerts. He went on about how he was missing you now and really wanted to see you. I guess girlfriend he isn’t with anyone and suddenly wants what was best for him that he gave up. I told him he should just move on, but he needs to hear that from you. I don’t ever want him hurting you again. I know this is not what you want to hear, but he ended the conversation telling me he loved you, he never stopped loving you.”
My heart dropped, now he says all this after his long absence, and the finality of our divorce. I couldn’t answer her, I was speechless. I fought back the tears that swelled in my eyes, but then they began to drip down my face and across my lips. “Madison, talk to me, I didn’t want to upset you. I had to be honest with you and not keep this from you. I think Thomas was an idiot for ever letting you go but I believe he loved you while you were married.”
“Oh, I know he loved me, and I loved him, it’s still so hard to understand why we ever parted after all those years, and he moved on so quickly to another, that hasn’t lasted.”
“Who knows how guys think, but totally his loss I say. I hate what he did to you. I support you in whatever you decide. If you decide to talk to him let him see you’re strong and that you’ve moved on. Maybe seeing him will bring you closure. I believe you need that. I know girlfriend that you’re torn and that’s tragic. My heart hurts for you, please know that I’ll be there for you as I always have been.”
I cleared my throat, “Jillian I could never thank you for being with me through all my drama and I will always need you. I’ll think about what you said. It’s a lot to think about. Let’s catch up soon; I’ll be home for a few weeks after we wrap up the show here in South Beach. I’m excited to plan Atlanta and I think you saw on the schedule after that we’ll be off to the Alamo. You’ll have to go shopping with me for cowboy boots and a cowboy hat.” I laughed. “I really miss you!” Jillian replied, “I miss you too.”
I gazed through my tear clouded sight to the phone for so long, I looked at the back of my eyelids as I sealed my eyes closed. My phone sounded:
You awake yet? Not sure you’re up sleepyhead. I couldn’t sleep; my thoughts kept seeing a music note nestled on one naked sexy belly. Stop me now… hope you aren’t sore. We have practice today and Maxwell asked us to meet up with some promo
tional marketing sponsors. It’s going to be a long afternoon. I was thinking do you like tapas and art? I’d like if you would join me tonight to visit some galleries in the Art Deco District and I know a great tapas place?
Rand
I wiped my eyes, and a smile came to my pursed lips. I replied:
I love art, I like the body artwork I had the rare opportunity of viewing last night. Actually I collect different pieces of art, so yes that would be really nice, and tapas for dinner sounds so much better than dining with the entire band, not that I don’t enjoy them all, but this evening sounds nice.
I sent that response, and then paused and sent this next one but, before I could finish typing it my eyes filled with cheerful tears and I hit send instead of rewriting it. I didn’t want him to know that I was crying and had been upset, it didn’t have to do with him.
Thank you Rand, I really need this. This will make me feel ……much better. I was upset…but
I knew in a moment he would surely respond, I waited, and I waited. No response came back and I released a big breath, maybe he put his phone away, then his response came. I heard a light tap on my door, “Madison, it’s Rand open the door…I’m here for you.”
I walked to the door; I held the door handle and then opened it wide. Rand looked at me, noticing my tear streaked face and wiped away my last tears. He did not question them; he just knew something wasn’t right by the way I said I really needed this night. I looked up at him and he kissed me and firmly grabbed hold of my waist. He pulled me into him, but then set me back and lifted up my pajama shirt, and looked at my belly piercing and smiled.
“Madison let it out, don’t write this, we all carry sadness, but I’d rather see you smile,” He tugged at my waist twisting me side to side playfully, “Anything you want to share with me?” He seized my jaw, tilting it upward toward his lips once more.
I shook my head no as I trembled and let out a smile.
“I’m looking forward to us going out tonight.” he changed the subject to a happier thought.
“Rand, I am too, I’m good, thank you. I’ll be fine. Sometimes I think too much.”
“I can take your worries away for awhile,” he proceeded to kiss and lift my pajama top higher.
“Oh I am sure you can keep my mind occupied, it’s just that Jillian and I were talking about my ex.”
“That I can’t help you with except to keep him as your ex,” Rand grinned.
“I’m going to be just fine, but thank you for your concern,” I smiled.
“See that’s what I like, seeing you smile.” Rand added, “Hey, this will make you laugh. You should see the guys since they got their piercings…Kent added another brow piercing. Raeford actually got his tongue pierced and said it hurts to talk. Ron got his nipple pierced, and Isaac, he went down low with a Prince Albert.”
I could actually picture all these and laughed aloud. I asked, “What did you get?”
He replied, “Me? I got a secret musical note,” as he pulled me in, and tucked me under his arm. I felt this warmth and decided to hold on to it for the rest of the day even though I knew he had to leave soon.
The Art Deco District that evening was amazing. There were so many galleries and as I enjoyed this time spent with Rand, I wondered if it was a date or just a friendly outing. Either title of this scenario I wouldn’t change how wonderful it was. We stopped into several of the art studios and one gallery had such wonderful canvas paintings. One in particular we both felt a vibe from was titled, “Separation.” It displayed two lovers, a man and a woman each walking away from the other and in a field of colors and high, wild weeds sweeping across the landscape and the sky was a setting orange and grey hue. We stood in front of it and took this all in. It was so innocent and yet powerful and seemed appropriate to our friendly, uncategorized relationship.
Rand seemed like he was really appreciating the art as we toured in and out of the district. Never once did he separate his hand from my fingers except when I excused myself to the ladies room. When I returned, I found him talking and smiling with one of the artist’s agents, and she was tall, built perfectly and simply lovely. He was quick to glance at me and halt his conversation, but not without a quick kiss to her cheek, at least it wasn’t to her lips. I did see him signing something for her as well so it appeared that she had asked him for his autograph, which was not uncommon at all, it happened very often when he or the band were out in public.
We enjoyed a great meal of small plates and conversation taking us deeper into what each other’s goals and hopes were in life. I had gotten the feeling that he didn’t open up like this to many. I felt like a sister sitting across from him just listening. I found that looking at this super fine-looking man across the table from me that there was such depth and emotion. Whatever love he lost saddened me but he was still such a kind person with substance. These were my mature thoughts but I also looked at him and just wanted to fall apart. All I wanted to feel was love but this could be a tragedy waiting for sure. He moved me inside without even knowing. He knew nothing of what I was thinking as he kept talking about the band’s funnier antics and I just smiled and wondered what we would be like if we were truly a couple. Would we be good for one another, or would we shatter one another? Could we trust each other? I know we could lust after one another. I was contemplating what would happen after I stopped traveling with him and the band…
“Madison, you want another drink?” He asked and interrupted my reveries. I nodded back and wasn’t sure what I was agreeing to. Rand took my hand and felt the inside of my palm and stroked his hand to my wrist. “Let’s get out of here”, he said deeply.
That evening I slept so well, no worries, no bad dreams, no thinking of life’s yesterdays, looking at life with all the tomorrows ahead. I awoke very refreshed. I grabbed my phone and sent Rand a text:
Rand, this morning I was flying high from our outing last night. Thank you for not letting me fall like I did earlier with the tears. I’m ordering room service since we are only here in South Beach one more night and I never order room service, do you want to join me?
I did not receive a reply; I guess he was still sleeping. He did need to rest because it appeared that he never slept. I got myself up and put the hotel robe over my pajamas – a cami top and underwear. I dialed the room service line and placed an order. Room service was really quick and as I heard the knock on the door I grabbed some money to tip the server. I opened the door and there stood Rand with a bottle of Dom Perignon and a quart of orange juice and a single rose. As he entered my hotel room, he hung the do not disturb tag on the door knob outside and tucked a fifty dollar bill next to it.
I never did receive my room service food order but sitting in bed making mimosas with Rand was fine. We played around, laughed, cuddled, tickled one another, had a vicious pillow fight that got out of hand since we started to use the heavier sofa pillows that were in the room and they hurt. We laughed so hard. I think we both worked up such a sweat that as we breathed heavily on the floor after our play the thought of a shower hit us like we read one another’s mind. Somehow, through playtime I lost the hotel robe and he lost his shirt so we just stared at each other’s chests rising and falling. Rand sat up and pulled me into the bathroom. We didn’t speak, we entered the shower. Steam filled the bathroom like the fog fills their stage and I felt that Rand was about to perform as the most romantic shower partner.
We stepped into the shower still in our few pieces of clothing, soaking them to our bodies like a second layer of skin, we laughed. Rand then began to lather my hair and washed my exposed neck. Before he spread the body wash all over me, he kissed each breast, and his teeth tugged at the thin drenched fabric covering me. I reached up and placed my hands around his neck, knotting my fingers together and dipped my head back to let the water spray across it and rinse my hair. He pulled my head back toward him and brought me close for a kiss. Our water soaked bodies swayed up against one another. My nipples tingled and hardened i
n my soaked cami top against his naked glistening chest. I am not sure who stopped this first but the water could have run all day; finally we were toweling off and still laughing.
I felt a dull ache as he said he had to get going and he would look for me at the show. After one more stolen kiss, I shut the door to him and went to change from my damp pajamas.
The South Beach show was again a hit. I again was taking mental notes to write down after the evening concluded. Maxwell watched over me and came out to the front of the stage and stood with me and I actually saw him make movement to the beat of some of the songs. He told me we all would check out in the morning and we would be back in Philly for a few weeks. He said he looked forward to me traveling with them to Atlanta next; this was the perfect opportunity for me asking him for passes for Jillian and her brother Jason. Maxwell said he would make any and all arrangements for them and it was no problem at all. I hugged him for some reason. Perhaps to thank him, but I was feeling a really nice bond with him and maybe out of appreciation for how nicely he took care of Rand. I felt him hold me tightly in the circle of my hugging arms.
I traveled back to the hotel with Maxwell and we shared a drink in the hotel lobby. I hung out there after Maxwell went up to his room, hoping the band and Rand would come in but it got even later, I headed to my room.
The Rolling Isaac’s never returned to the hotel that night, not until the morning. All of them wearing the same clothes, and very tired eyes. They chatted about their very, very long night.
On our travel back, Rand leaned his head softly on my shoulder and fell asleep but in his napping he spoke here and there, saying, “No I can’t…oh, I really do want you, we could be great.” I shuttered and could only imaging where they all went and what happened. I glanced out the airplane’s window into the sea of clouds; I was floating on top of the wispy, white puffs, but could see the squall colors brewing below. Was all this wonder I felt with Rand just the calm before our storm? I looked out into to the vast open sky beyond the wing of the plane, we would be home soon. With Rand now quietly sleeping, I lightly touched my stomach and felt the jewel underneath. I pulled open my notebook, not disturbing his sleep and I began to write him another love note.
Rand:
As I dangle my little music note from my belly, I get yet another rush. I have to pause to breathe and I keep my eyes closed and see you as clearly as you touched me so gently, so seductively. I feel this little gem on my navel sparkles like a little hidden secret between us. I want to be your musical note, one that plays a tune in your heart endlessly. I see in the darkness of my lids, you barely touching my body and yet it instinctively moves toward your touch, craving that nearness. I feel you and want that touch again; I want you to continue with the course your finger tips were heading. I don’t know what is occurring in me but there has certainly developed a hunger like no other.
I want to tell you in just this short time we have spent together that it has all been such a different feeling for me from my past. I know in my heart that it will probably go no father than my travels with you and the band, but it’s intriguing and unknown and perhaps that is part of the pull that draws me near, but I know that I can’t seem to get enough of you right now. I hope you don’t know my fears – the fear of never feeling your touch again. I tread lightly not to speak out to your actions for you have given me both the opportunity to write again and to feel again. Until you came along I was uncertain I’d feel such emotion once more. I know you won’t read this, you won’t know my innermost thoughts but that is fine as if this is to be it will, if we are to be one we will. Somehow our two different worlds may collide and I await that. I will wait and hear, feel the hairs on my skin prickle sensing your presence.
Maddy xo